When I'm alone
I ponder on the fees I pay
For my philosophy
I harken to see the end
To predict the shape of the finished web
The life still yet to descend
I try immensely to decipher the thoughts of God
While passionately chewing on a soft bone
When I’m alone
I build odds among the odds
Like creating an awe-like perfect painting
With diverse uglies
In a way it reminds me of me
A cohesive beauty with recesses that need fixing
More like tweaking, or redeeming, maybe changing
It activates a compassion towards my sometimes unruly reasoning
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Its still too early
Indeed
I have to make this face
Or Il let them stay
Those little hopping rocks
Parading their multi coloured coats
Tiny dreamers like Joseph
Averring claims no one understands
Those swift flying rocks
Landing with ease each time
Quick and elegant
As if communing with the breeze-
Their master
Who carries their incoherent song
As they rollick through the space
While its still early
Il make this face-
To keep my heart ready to stand against
Their charming bickers
A uniform of elders and children
Its past pleasing
But I've planted the seeds
Of regal trees
Hence Il make this face
In readiness to chase away
My most loveliest adversary
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Close the doors
Let me see me
On all true walls
The flow of my mind
The cadence of my heart
The dance in my bright eyes
The lovely of my smile
The cozy of my languish laughter
The comfort in my dreamy arms
The future in my hands
I've wondered what they could do
Break the earth in half
Dig a damn for my clan
The truth about me
I've wondered what I could do
Leave a morass with a step
Topple an army with a breath
I've wondered who I could be for you
A sun to your moon
A fruit for your room
Walls walls with the truth
Who am I despite the rules
You are a pacific wilderness
A slow muse
A free religion
A tender fuse
A torrential sameness
I discovered you
With sluggish attempts
I found you limping
On wounded courage
Yet still reaching
With sweet congruence
You are a wondrous gloom
A thoughtful ocean
God knit you
Layer by layer
You are a slow lucid prayer
A decisive arrow
A passionate tune
A something new
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That day
Pieces of the sky fell to the earth
The passions of men were dragged in the soil
Trust become an unwelcome friend
The wings of every bird dissolved in the air
There were no fruits after the flowers-
and thorns had great power
Snow was ash from the battle of angels
There was no hope to spark the engines
So they walked or sat in their dungeons
Waiting on the oil of freedom -
and a glory to unravel
Fierce love caught me by my sleeve
I pondered on it in my sleep-
and it grew a shell that covered my shamed skin
Silent love gave me a voice to sing
I sang hymns with the holy birds of spring-
Indulging the ruler of realms
Suffering love drowned my every fear
I went and sought bounty in the enemie's midst-
and my arms were free, for treasures came out following me
Pure love cleansed my blood of sin
I dreamt of an ever warm sun once that year-
and I poured my minds' war into the cold sea
My chest now swells with gladness
Seeing that great affection extended its reach to cover me
To save me from eternal ending
A ransom for his origin
An endless love collision
A rose that bled crimson
Revealing the praised hallowed
Filling mens' hollow
Declarations from the higher deep
Of mercies and consecrated peace
Word manifest as presence
Essence sculpted bodily
The breathing expression
Deity in motion
Passion in action
Rescue me from the jaws of the beast
Despair he feeds from me
My limbs are weak and stiff
I am at the end of what I thought was me
Confront my anguish and tears
They are a potion of mixed beliefs
I wandered and wandered and fell into the mouth of the beast
Now I sit and stare
As he chews and churns
Everyone else is unaware of the horror of his glare
All they see is a friendly man
I tire of this curse
The fading strength of my bare hands
I thought this was the way of the free
A life lived with no paid fees
I cannot tell for sure what I really need
Each day brings no relief
He lies and they believe
He is actually a thief
Now I find myself trying to escape
My minds’ most evil plague
My soul is grappling about, for a life worthy to undertake
All my days, I spend dreaming of someplace safe
Still, I get weaker and more frail
Who can speak for me and free me from this cage
I'm addicted to home
Being alone
Songs have a different tone
and my skin is a robe
Comfort dances in my bones
Bringing cheer to my soul
Drowning out life's blows
Coaxing the rhythm of slow
Separating friend from foe
Maintaining the mode of hope
Wholly bright as the sun
So free and carefree
BEL 